EPISTLE TO THE BROKE BOYS
These are the words of the Seer to the community of the broke boys in Nigeria and beyond. Beloved, hear ye him and take his words to heart, knowing fully well that it shall help your mental health and position you for greater things in the coming days.
It is no news that a man’s usefulness in society is solely dependent on what he can provide and not who he is. In this scenario, no value or respect is placed on his head until he becomes capable to pay bills. This has been in place since time immemorial and would not go away anytime soon.
“If you no get money, hide your face”. I can remember our very own Choirmaster, David Adeleke use that phrase in his global song “FIA”. The reality of that phrase cannot be overemphasized for young men starting their lives. Guys in the university, young school leavers still trying to find their feet in life, this is for you.
The standard has been set so high now. Ubiquitous in the environment is young people with lavish lifestyles all built on internet fraud. It is very common to hear people cast aspersions at you for not reaching that touchstone.
Going into a relationship as a broke boy is likened to passing through the fire with a keg of petrol strapped firmly to your back. In most cases, you invest all your emotions and the little you have, yet she still walks away with the highest bidder. Someone that can take care of her needs comfortably and give her all the perks of what the society deems fit. If love checks your pocket, I am sure it would not even bother leading you talk less of making you fall. When your partner starts telling you “See what your mates are doing”, take that as an early quit notice.
Another thing is coping with friends. As a broke boy, it is very normal that some of your friends would leave you because you are not on their level anymore. Worse still, many will still rub it in your face. I can tell you for free that at that moment, you will be like beans inside a pressure cooker. If you now have other guys into freelancing and maybe tech, you would think your life is just useless. Sometimes, when they call for an outing, you might just find an excuse not to just show up. Imagine this scenario when they strike out your name from an event because you don’t measure up.
Coming to social media to see your monthly income being broke shamed as not even able to cover the expenses of a single date? I know how it feels. You would just be tired of your life without anyone telling you.
Guy, the list is endless. What about the impromptu billing from your younger ones and cousins? Or they are not posting your picture as MCM again?
I can go on and on.
Amidst all of these things, never devalue yourself. Because you are not spinning in the cash now doesn’t mean you would never get to. This is the time to focus on yourself. Build, plan and structure a future that can make you thrive. Not everybody would have the necessary skill to freelance, a lot more are built for the cooperate world. If you can learn a skill, please do. If you can’t, then make sure you have a career path well thought out.
The pressure can lead to depression, envy and even hate. Dear broke guy, you have to channel your frustration into turning your situation around. Of course in this state, you would still have people that will choose to standby regardless. Cherish them. Put yourself in projects and challenges that would set you on your required path. Don’t mire in your financial status. It would change. Be open to ideas and keep your ears down for opportunities you can apply yourself to. Never let yourself down. Don’t sell your integrity and soil your name in the name of hustling. You can make it legitimately.
Esteem yourself highly. You are valuable. Make yourself happy.
When you secure the bag, then love can come.
Don’t be scared (In Yoruba). You go dey alright.
“Your beans go soon done”.